No Shame Game

What usually stops you from getting what you want? Is it that little voice in your head that tells you that you'll probably fail? Are you scared about what other people will think? Have people told you in the past that you weren't smart or attractive enough?

We all have insecurities that can keep us from achieving what we truly want. Rejection and failure goes hand in hand with taking a risk and going for it. No pain, no gain. The more we put ourselves out there, the more likely we will face rejection. This is true when applying to jobs, trying to get in at a club and especially, dating. 

The first thing I tell any new client is that any shame or embarrassment they might ever felt has to go out the window. Starting this moment on, you do not feel any shame. You do not care if someone snubs you or isn't interested in pursing a conversation with you. This is all practice for when you meet the right person. I tell them they will face a 90% rejection rate. That seems pretty high but I'm also forcing them to talk to 30+ men in a single week. I do this to help them feel comfortable starting conversations with men they don't know and feel confident doing so. The more you practice anything, the easier it becomes. Same is true for dating. 

Women in the past have always waited for men to make the first move but if you're in your mid-30s and want to meet someone NOW, you can't wait around hoping Prince Charming will tap you on the shoulder. You have to make opportunities happen for yourself. I promise you, if a confident, happy women approaches a group of men to say hello, they will not tell her to turn around and walk away. 

Some women say that they have no problem doing this and can approach men all day long but the part they are missing is their INTENTION! If you go into a conversation with the intention to get something out of someone, they will instantly sense it and go on the defense. But if your intention is nothing more than to brighten their day a little, they will welcome your presence with open arms. 

Yes, it can be scary at first to go up to a bunch of strange men and start saying hello but it's the best chance you can give yourself to meet some new people, practice being that bright, positive person and you just might get a date out of it. 



Anna Morgenstern